Why You Should Stop Calling Your Girlfriends "Two-Faced"
By: Casey Harding-Brown
“She’s so two-faced, she’s so fake.” The amount of times I heard or said something along these lines while growing up is uncountable. I used to call one of my best friends “5-faced” because I felt she had a different personality for seemingly every person and situation.
What I later came to realize, and wished I had come to the conclusion sooner, was that my girlfriends weren’t fake, they were multi-faceted with personalities that had wide spectrums. What a beautiful thing that is!
Disclaimer: I am not referring to the person who says one thing to you and turns around and says the opposite to someone else. They are fake and you should consider cutting them out of your circle.
Since every person is unique, their relationships with other individuals are also unique. There is a reason we have more than one friend. Every person in our life brings something different to the table, including their vibe and energy. We pick up on this either consciously or subconsciously and we react in our own ways.
Have you ever been around someone really happy-go-lucky and all of a sudden you feel the same way? Or in the opposite effect, you feel the need to balance this energy so you put on a more “realistic point of view” disposition. This is because you are playing off each other’s vibe or personality.
If you’re hanging out with your girlfriend and another friend comes over and you notice a change in her mood or temperament don’t automatically think they’re being weird, different, fake etc. They might be being different than they are with YOU while still being true to themselves. Your relationship with them is unique and just how you act differently with your friends from work vs your friends from school vs your friends from childhood, they should be allowed the same freedom without your concern or judgment.
Different situations will also bring out different parts of people’s persona. Maybe you’ve never seen your girlfriend super stressed or dealing with a big life change and when they act differently than what you’ve seen before it might lead you to think they’re acting “off” but in reality, they are just being the versions of themselves they are feeling in that particular moment.
We as people also love to put others in categories. Extrovert, introvert, yogi, type-A, bitch, spiritual, religious etc. It is totally possible (and NORMAL!) for you to want to read a book one night and go drink copious amounts of alcohol and shake your ass in the club the next night.
Just because someone is a “yogi” doesn’t mean they have to be grounded and kind ALL the time. It’s not only impractical, but it’s also so limiting! The sooner you embrace your girlfriend’s multi-faceted selves the sooner you can stop limiting them, yourself and your relationship with them.
